Showing posts with label Misogyny. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Misogyny. Show all posts

Wednesday, October 8, 2014

Girlfriend and her sister - Buy one get one free

I personally think, or rather, used to think that Snapdeal was doing fairly okay until I saw their latest ad.

I'm unable to find the link, but the ad goes something like this.

A man is staring at his phone while going on about how his girlfriend's sister is so cute she comes along everywhere they go. And how it is so similar to Snapdeal's buy one get one free offer. Wonder if Snapdeal has started offering wives'/girlfriends'/partners' sisters along for 'use' by the consumer. Wonder if they have to really stoop down to such levels to sell their website. I used to buy from Snapdeal but now, I have lost all respect for the company.

Most readers will not even find the ad offensive. Some of you will flood my inbox saying, "Gee, be chill, this is just an ad, that's all..."

Just an ad categorizing women as products to be availed of when buy one get one free offer is available. Men are free too access their wives'/girlfriends'/partners' sisters under this offer. JUST AN AD.,

Yes, this is as chill as several years ago, purdah and not educating women were also quite acceptable. What's the whole fuss about? Gee, it's JUST SOME PRACTICES isn't it?

Dehumanizing women as products to be 'available for free' is NOT OKAY.

Those who find this ad 'just an ad' are either too conditioned to live with gender discrimination, sexism and gender stereotypes, or are the beneficiaries of such practices, such as the 'consumers' availing the 'buy one get one free girlfriend' offer.

The world has progressed steadily since the days of purdah and sati but sexism still prevails. Then, it was,

"Saali aadhi gharwaali" (Wife's sister is half wife)

Ironically, the husband's brother is supposed to be like the wife's son. Even in gender stereotyping, these sexists do not play fair.

This society is giving out a clear message to everyone, "Do what you want, we aren't going to stop treating women as substandard human beings or objects to be sold, bought and even gleefully obtained on an offer." Just like buying old clothes from a thrift store.

Yet another classic example of objectification of women getting away scott free. Only this time, people will be criticizing me and several other women for not being game and taking this as JUST AN AD.

Just an ad where they have sold my dignity as a woman to be a product instead - to be bought and sold on discount.

Saturday, December 21, 2013

Public interest message- Derogatory graffiti

Today I was returning home from office. Inside the first class compartment of the Chengalpattu fast local, in the ladies seats, a highly derogatory statement was scribbled in bold lettering just under the window:

"These six women (six seats in the ladies' section) will ****. They will **** a ************* for Rs. **** per night..."

Many ladies were already seated there, and so was I. Everyone was oblivious to that graffiti. But, our co-passengers in other seats were looking at it again and again.

I took pictures of it and lodged a complaint at the station with the station master. I urged him to have the graffiti erased. Of course, I noted down the coach and train number and retained my own ticket for the purpose of record.

I am posting it here because we as a nation have failed innumerable times to uphold the dignity of women. Misogyny and sexism are so prevalent that we have conditioned ourselves to accept them as a normal part of life.

I don't know how many people have complained about that graffiti before me, but I know one thing for sure- nothing has been done about it so far. I hope the authorities don't turn a blind eye to my written complaint.

Please spread this message to others and let public places be dignified enough for women.

Thousands of women sit in those six seats everyday. Any of those women can happen to be your friends, colleagues, mothers, sisters, daughters or wives.

Monday, October 5, 2009

The Prayer of a Daughter

I pray not for myself
Contented am I with the gifts of infancy
My mother blessed me with
Bickering with her better half to bring me forth
For their bundle of joy lacked mirth
Set to enter the world of frills
Yet she endured me, for nine months
Through searing pain, birthed a fruitless labour of love

I pray not for myself
Contented am I with the home I was bestowed with
A few breaths of air once outside her
Then she wrapped my shriveled self in a generous warm rag
Gave me care in the cradle of her arms, though momentary
Helpless, put me to bed on a mushy rotting sack
Weeping, she left me under the stars
Nudged by a breeze loaded with
The smells of the sweat of my first shelter
Where everything decomposed to give me a warm organic bed
To lie down and rest, to live
For so many others too, my siblings
Under the roof of the skies
Tiny flies buzzed in my unformed ears, singing sweet lullabies
Grunting pigs to reassure me of company
Amidst my wails, the barking of street dogs
Baying for my precious life, to devour the tender flesh off me
But when my tear laden eyes saw her face
In the moon’s glow, I understood the challenge to me
There were devils yes, but despite them I was meant to be
Her maternity shrouded me as the moonlight
I slept; I did survive that unforgiving night

I pray not for myself
Contented am I, with human care at last
A human to eventually pick me up from the squalor
Not my mother but a mother nevertheless
No maternity in her breast but motherhood in her heart nevertheless
Sweet kisses that erased the memories of our own teary farewell
A family with real people, real siblings, real human love
Welcomed me heartily into my warm pink world

I’m happy
I pray not for me but for you
You, who returned that night, empty arms, empty womb
Lonely days you spent emptying yourself of blood, milk and tears
In an empty home to live with an empty heart
With an empty someone, who loved the fruits
But not the labour that your sex took
In this barrenness, you missed the bundle
That could’ve filled your waiting arms
Of the fairer sex like you, but not devoid of her unique charms
No chubby finger to jab at you and suckle at your love
No ribbons for curly plaits no pink frocks and all above
You missed your live doll to play with dolls
A sweet and innocent heart to love you through your falls
You missed the pretty maiden to whom you’d have been
A friend, philosopher and guide to be with in embarrassing teens
A growing woman, to bring up strong
To fight the uncompromising chauvinist world
To fight with you as well, why her skirts were too long
To question you in everything that you said was ladylike
Later a woman like you, your own confidante
A head to nod, ears to listen and a heart to sympathize
With your own complaints, against the world or household
Or even how burdensome this stubborn girl was to you
Till you bade her a teary farewell, this time happily
The light of your home to light up another
Just the way you did

I pray not for myself, mother, but for you
My father who took a narrow minded turn, for you too
You may have saved some cost by preferring an earning boy
Than a trusting, loving, caring girl
But it’s a daughter you missed